Showing posts with label Paul Pierce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Paul Pierce. Show all posts

Saturday, May 16, 2009

I'm Still Alive, Still Talking Shit

Sorry about the lack of updates. No I didn't die, though the question's begging to be asked that if I did die how would you all know? The answer being, well if I got off my ass and posted more regularly you'd know something happened to me because the posts would stop coming. This is why I need to get someone reliable, pithy, funny, interesting and who can be the Lamar Odom to my Kobe on this blog and come in from time to time and pick me up. I'm not even looking for a sidekick, just a third option would do.

Anyways basketball has all but consumed me all month with the Boston Celtics giving me heart attack after heart attack. I won't even go into the details but they better find a way to get it done today. I'm fairly certain that they will but if they don't a shitstorm awaits me and them in our own individual rights of course. They'll get it from the media and I'll have to hear about it from the relentless jerks I drape my life with. Which I can't be mad at because I'd serve in much the same capacity if they went all out over something or someone and were proven wrong. It's part of the game.

Oh well, regardless come Monday, I'll be back to posting regularly because by then the Celtics will either be done for the summer or they'll be facing the Cleveland Cavaliers which actually means they'll be done for the summer too so I can shift my attention to other things finally. Though it's a lot easier of a pill to swallow going out as one of the final four teams standing in late May then it is going out to Ron Jeremy's panicky little brother. Plus I'm just generally tired of the way people who know nothing fawn over Kevin Garnett and give no credit to Pierce & Co. as a very able group with or without The Big Ticket. If you're missing Kevin Garnett, Leon Powe and James Posey this year that you had last year when you won it all and still find yourself in the conference finals then it delegitimizes a ton of crazy talk of undervaluing Paul Pierce and the team that the media has been guilty of for a while now. Just a thought to consider.

Either way you'll see me again Monday and maybe even sooner (if everything turns out aces tonight) so don't jump ship on the site yet. Although oddly enough I have been experiencing huge hits this month despite my lack of posting. Maybe more is less? Maybe I'm T-Mac and my website is the Houston Rockets. His Aura Is Orange might be better off without me after all. *Sigh*....


[Damn he's annoying...]

Thursday, April 16, 2009

You Don't Really Believe It, You're Just Saying It To Say It


This team is done for the playoffs!

They can't beat LBJ in the ECF!

They can't beat Orlando!

They probably won't even beat seventh seeded Chicago!




Pardon me for laughing at that. I mean they said this last year. They said last year was the Lakers' year and how dare you even walk onto the same court with Kobe Bryant and Kobulous Ko-Stars? Yeah you'll have to pardon me for not caring what these guys say. They always overreach. These are the same guys who double down on the Sooners when they play Boise St. Same dudes who tell you every year that USC might be the greatest football team there ever was.

Wherever there exists an opportunity for these kinds of people to say things like this they swoop in like the vultures they are and assert there opinion into the mix and if you disagree with these cats you're not to be taken serious. The game of it all is that they get you to agree with them if you're to be taken seriously at all and if you do happen to disagree and have the audacity to speak your mind, then you're crazy and that alone is enough of a disqualifier in stating your opinion on the matter. Only if you go along with them and agree just to appease their ego and your shared predictions turn out to be wrong, don't expect for this guy to admit he and popular thinking was wrong because he won't be. He'll say that nobody else could have saw that coming and if they tell you otherwise they're lying. You put everything on the line when you make a prediction counter to popular opinion and when you're right you're just lucky. He puts everything on the line in saying how it's a slam dunk result and you're an idiot for believing otherwise and when he is wrong, he's not really wrong as it was a fluke and flukes happen and his credibility can't possibly take a hit on the matter because nobody in the entire universe could have seen it turning out the way it did.

When you get it right, you get faint praise and revisionism. When he gets it right he makes sure you know how stupid you were for not riding along with him and the world stinks with his farts for a month and you've got to smell them and say the place smells like roses.
Anyway's despite everybody wringing their hands in the air and getting out of their cars doing Chinese fire-drills and yelling at the height of their voices about how all is over and all that's left is dirt and wreaths and how the Celtics can possibly win in any fashion in the playoffs when they still amassed a 27-9 record without KG for the past two seasons...


MY PREDICTION: Celtics 4-2 Over The Chicago Bulls
then...

Celtics 4-3 Over The Orlando Magic
then...

Cavs 4-2 Over The Boston Celtics in the ECF


.....as always if I'm wrong, you're welcome to remind me that I was, but if I'm right, expect to hear about that too....

Friday, February 27, 2009

Celtics Officially Sign Stephon Marbury (God Help Us)

Celtics president Danny Ainge confirmed that guard Stephon Marbury has signed a contract.

The two-time All-Star is now undergoing a physical and is expected to attend a closed practice at TD Banknorth Garden at 5 p.m. before tonight's game against Indiana.

It remains uncertain if Marbury will be in uniform tonight, but given that the Celtics have just 11 players in uniform, it's possible that they may need him to suit up in case of an emergency situation. He will wear the jersey #8.


This is awful awful news. I'm predicting now that within a week Stephon Marbury will turn into David Ruffin. Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett will probably walk into his hotel room one day on the road and this scene will ensue:



God help us. :(

Friday, December 5, 2008

New Paul Pierce Sports Illustrated Nine Page Spread


"I've always been the Rodney Dangerfield of this game," he says. "Maybe it was meant to be that way, but that always drove me. If somebody said, 'You're going to be the Number 1 pick, you're going to have a great team around you all these years'? It would've been too easy." - Paul Pierce




On Paul's Father

George Pierce never lived with Lorraine. Paul was no more than six the last time he saw his dad. Cornelia Pierce, George's wife, answers the phone at their home. She's cordial but has little desire to open old wounds. "I'm a strong woman," she says. "I've prayed over it and I've accepted the whole situation; in fact, I watch many of Paul's games. I feel that Paul is an innocent bystander, as well as I am. I'm a Christian woman, so I look at things from the positive side and I don't have any regrets, or any attitude or anything. George and I have been married for 45 years." Paul and Lorraine moved to Inglewood in 1988, and that year Jamal Hosey [Paul's Oldest Brother] saw George Pierce one last time. "I yelled at him, 'You know, you got a great kid! You at least could call him, you bum!'" Jamal says. "Then my wife pulled me, and I walked away."

On New GM Danny Ainge in 2004

The slaps kept coming. In 2003 Pierce had his first playoff triple double in the second round against New Jersey and led Boston in postseason assists and scoring. But the Celts lost to the Nets, and when Ainge took over as general manager that May, he unloaded Walker. "He didn't think highly of me and Antoine at all, and I knew this," Pierce says. "So I'm already thinking, He's not feeling my game; I don't need to try to build a relationship because he already doesn't like me and just traded Antoine. Maybe I'm next."



On Coach Doc Rivers


Doc Rivers took over as Boston coach in 2004, and for half of that season he and Pierce clashed. The Celtics were rebuilding and had used three first-round picks to bring in Al Jefferson, Delonte West and Tony Allen. Rivers wanted Pierce to trust his young teammates more and stop playing his ponderous isolation game. Trust? With a championship looking ever more distant, Pierce didn't trust Ainge to get the winning players the team needed and didn't trust Rivers's approach. It came as no shock to hear, on draft night two months later, that Ainge was close to dealing Pierce for the rights to rookie guard Chris Paul.
When that deal fell through, it looked like star and team would be stuck in one of those bad NBA marriages. But during the two awful seasons following 2005, Pierce never tuned the coach out. Rivers kept waiting for Pierce's supposed selfishness to kick in, but "even though it wasn't working—and he was fighting it—he was still trying to do [what was needed]," Rivers says. "That's not a selfish person."

On The Worst Year Of The Franchise

The team won just 24 games in 2006--07, and late in the season Pierce told a Boston reporter, "I'm the classic case of a great player on a bad team, and it stinks." Yet such foot-stomping had become more exception than rule; Ainge, Rivers, his brothers Jamal and Steve had noticed that, as Pierce says, "my spirits really changed." He had been seeing a woman named Julie Landrum since '05, and Pierce credits her with teaching him to think more positively and "keeping me happy." Out for nearly half the '06--07 season with injuries, Pierce watched Boston lose a record 18 straight. He realized that, at 29, he was as far as ever from winning a title, and his first impulse was to publicly demand a trade. Landrum talked him out of it.



George Karl On Pierce Stepping His Game Up From All Angles Last Year


"What I saw was commitment," Karl says. "If the game said, 'Be a defender'? He was a defender. If the game said, 'Be a rebounder'? He was a rebounder. If the game said, 'Be an orchestrator'? He was an orchestrator. He made his career scoring points, but last year? What the game asked him to do, he did." Pierce's performance in the Celtics' dismantling of the Lakers in the Finals sealed [it]. In Game 1 he left the court with a knee injury, but he returned to hit two three-pointers and give Boston the lead for good. In Game 2 he led the Celtics in scoring and held off L.A.'s desperate comeback with two key free throws and a block on Sasha Vujacic's three-pointer. With Boston down 18 at the half of Game 4, Pierce demanded that Rivers let him guard Bryant, then dogged the Lakers guard relentlessly, blocked one of his jumpers and held him to 6-of-15 shooting, and the Celtics fought all the way back to win and take a 3--1 series lead. Pierce, the Finals MVP, would outplay Bryant again in the next game and Boston would win in six, but the championship—and Pierce's legacy—was secured in Game 4. George Karl is 57 and has seen the greatest, from Russell to Jordan, produce the kind of basketball that can make a coach swoon. He was in the building for the Celts' miraculous comeback and saw it up close. "Probably the best half of basketball I can remember one player playing," Karl says.



On Being Present For The Birth Of His Child Earlier This Year


"It was unreal," he whispers. It made him decide some things. "I don't want to be the dad that my father was," Pierce says. "I want to see my child grow. Who knows if I would've made it if he had been involved? Who knows if I would've been that much better? Who knows? But I'm sure his influence wouldn't have hurt those times I fell off my bike or didn't have nobody to rebound for me. I want to be there for my daughter—when she falls, to pick her up. When she needs help with homework."


Find the full Sports Illustrated Feature Here.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Paul Pierce Is The Best In The Game And This Week Isn't Contradicting That

You don't have to like him.

You don't have to like his game.

You might even prefer a flashier Kobe Bryant/LeBron James type but it's really hard to say my dude isn't getting it in right now (and by right now I mean the last several months). He's gritty, he's one of the most durable superstars in the league, he's quiet off the court and doesn't demand that kind of attention as a celebrity (which is probably why he's not getting the love his game demands) but the man delivers. He's been sold me that he was the guy as far back as a decade but now anyone with any reasonable standards with two eyes and without bias has to give the guy his just due; his numbers and W's demand it.

It's time. It's alright. You can let go of the irrational hatred or whatever it is that allows you to deny him. Whatever metric you wish to use, he stacks up with the best. He's the most clutch player in the league (yes I said it). He's got the hardware and jewelry now which was the only knack against him before 2007. He's the calm, level headed, cool demeanor that everybody looks for in a favorite player and he's got the game to back up his claims this summer in Spain that he is the best player in the world. He got off to a somewhat rocky start this year but he's been battling a hand injury although you couldn't tell over the last few games.

First vs. Toronto:

Tonight's Game Winner vs. unbeaten Atlanta:


If this is any indication of things to come, it's going to be a long season for the haters. This is not going to stop being the case any time soon so you can pull your fingers out of your ears, open your eyes and stop humming songs to drown out what I'm saying. It's pointless. He's going to keep doing this kind of shit and I'm going to keep telling you about it. He's going to keep embarrassing and outdueling your favorite players and you're going to get used to it and accept it. He's going to keep winning and you're going to keep losing.

The great part about it, the truly awesome thing is...you've got seven more months of eating shit sandwiches if you still aren't coming around.

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Update
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KG was his usual (and somewhat unintentionally) hilarious self in the post-game press conference. Seated next to Paul Pierce, who hit the game-winner with 0.5 seconds left, Garnett said: "The last play was drawn up: Get the ball to Pierce; get the hell out the way. Superman's in the booth. Let's go home. That was the play, and if you don’t believe that ask Doc Rivers and he'll say the same exact thing." It's worth noting that a humble-sounding Pierce claimed the play was designed for KG to drive to the hoop if the lane was open, but since it wasn't Garnett handed off to him and he took the shot.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Okay, The NBA Season Is Around The Corner


And I came across this interesting breakdown of career numbers between Paul Pierce (my favorite basketball player), Kobe Bryant (widely believed in many basketball circles to be the best basketball player in the world) and Michael Jordan. Now I've always believed that Pierce is the best basketball player and as you may well be aware the internet is the prom for Kobe-stanleys and so I've had many run-ins with them through the years but to put it in perspective of how similar their numbers have been even before Paul Pierce's breakout season last year these were the numbers of all three players in comparison (You can click the pic to enlarge it if it isn't legible enough):


So to put it bluntly, when Paul Pierce gets another ring, as he most certainly will, and gets an additional Finals MVP trophy, the Kobe Cult should be very afraid. Very afraid as Paul will have gotten another year closer in matching your God's rings and having already matched his stats and have more Finals MVP trophies as well and thus will be regarded as the.better.basketball.player.of.his.day *gasp*

It's coming....

Be afraid, stanleys.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Boston Celtics @ The White House

Even though I'll have forgotten about this ten minutes from after this is posted I'm not happy to see this. Paul Pierce is my dude but he look a little too damn happy to be there.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Paul Pierce: 'I'm The Best Basketball Player In The World'

Finals MVP Paul Pierce, who recently spent three days at a ball camp in Madrid, is making, ahem, news about what he said to a Spanish reporter.

Q: Is Kobe really the best player in the world?

Pierce:"I don't think Kobe is the best player. I'm the best player. There's a line that separates having confidence and being conceited. I don't cross that line but I have a lot of confidence in myself."

My take: Look, I know what happens next. I've seen it time and time again. You get thousands on thousands of Lakers and Kobe Stans who will now come out of the woodwork and say all kinds of slights about Paul Pierce because he thinks he's better than Kobe and to these idiots, 'them is fightin' words'. I get all that. My question, and I hope they will ask themselves this before they grab their pitchforks and burning candles and shotguns and go on a lynching spree like the extremists they are, is what did you expect him to say? I mean really. His team just Fleece Johnson'd ("somebody's giving up some booty") your squad on the biggest stage and individually earned recognition as the best player of the series via his NBA Finals MVP trophy. He outplayed Kobe on both ends of the floor. He earned the MVP Trophy not even at full strength (clearly he didn't tear his ACL but he wasn't 100% I don't care what the stanleys say). He stared down LeBron James in a closeout game and lived to tell about it. And lastly overall, he was the best player of the entire 2008 NBA Playoffs proving all the B.S his critics pointed to about him not being clutch wrong. If he doesn't deserve to be confident I don't know who does right now, at this time. You play poorly and you eat a plate of crow. You play great and you reap the benefits of raising your stature. That's just one plus one equals two. Really, you learn those kinds of basics in elementary school recess periods. Besides, he was asked a direct question and he gave an honest answer. Not a packaged, political company line. You expect him to say somebody else is better than him? Not likely. I applaud, Paul. Only, you better come out how you left off in June man. You want to be the best, you better be able to put that title on the line every night, city after city. I think you got it in you personally, but the world doesn't. Prove me right and them wrong.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Jimmy Kimmel Eating Paul Pierce's HeadBand



He's a good sport.

In related news, Paul Pierce will be on tomorrow night's show, check your listings for time and channel.

Monday, June 23, 2008

The Truth About Paul Pierce


"So maybe the enduring lesson of Paul Pierce, owner of the most under-rated sports nickname of the last decade, is this: the truth is never quite as exciting as perception. "
I like this article and smiled when I read it so I'm posting it. If you aren't a fan of Paul Pierce or the NBA skip past this article to the wonderful Meghan McCain below this post.

--------------------------------

If nothing else, the 2008 NBA Finals will be remembered for proving several theories beyond a reasonable doubt.

For instance, we can now be sure of the following.

1. Sasha Vujacic is the most annoying professional basketball player since Bill Laimbeer (and the worst part of the ongoing soccerization of the NBA).

2. The idea of Lamar Odom is always preferable to the reality (see also Gasol, Pau).

3. If you are a pregnant woman on a television sitcom and your water breaks and you need to be rushed to the hospital, Kevin Garnett is the not the person you’d want driving the car. (To use another medical-related analogy, if KG were a heart surgeon, he’d punch a hole in your chest and rip the still-beating organ out with his bare hands. Impressive in his intensity, physical ability and determination, sure. But not the guy you want to save your life.)

4. Jack Nicholson is now slightly more interested than Phil Jackson in coaching the Los Angeles Lakers.

5. Chris Mihm is still alive.

6. Paul Pierce is a Hall of Famer.

With all due respect to Sasha, Lamar, Jack, Chris and KG’s ultimately crushing fear of failure, it is this sixth confirmation that is most intriguing. Because previous to this Paul Pierce was the least remarkable superstar in the NBA. Or at least the least celebrated. And this was probably unjust. If not at all that surprising.

After three years at the University of Kansas, where according to Wikipedia he majored in crime and delinquency studies, Pierce was taken 10th overall in 1998, a third of the way through maybe the worst first round in NBA draft history. Behold those 29 picks and try not to laugh (or dry heave). Michael Olowokandi went number one to the Clippers. Raef LaFrentz went third. Robert Traylor, sixth. Jason Williams, seventh. Pierce was taken one spot ahead of Bonzi Wells, two spots ahead of Michael Doleac.

(Not to dwell on this draft, but seriously. Bryce Drew? Michael Dickerson? Brian Skinner? Mirsad Turkcan? And in addition to Wells, you’ve got a starting line-up of headcases with Keon Clark, Ricky Davis, Ruben Patterson and Rafer Alston. Even the good picks were somehow awful. Milwaukee took Dirk Nowitzki ninth but dealt him to Dallas—for Tractor Traylor and the rights to Pat Garrity. Toronto flipped the eventually reliable Antwan Jamison for the periodically crippled Vince Carter. This is why those guys who run mock draft websites are primarily driven by unresolved sadness.)

In his rookie season he scored 16.5 points per game, but has since never averaged less than 19.5 ppg (peaking in 2005-2006 when he averaged 26.8). He has played in six all-star games, led the Celtics to the Eastern Conference semi-finals in 2002, and shot more free throws than any other player in the 2002-2003 season.

Still. Though he made the all-rookie team in 1999, he’s since never been named to the first or second all-NBA teams. He’s never finished higher than 11th in MVP voting. He led the league in total points one year, but the official scoring title goes to whoever averages the most points per game (and that year Allen Iverson was smart enough to boost his average by strategically missing 22 games). The only other time Pierce led the NBA in anything was in the 2003-2004 season, when he finished with the most turnovers.

Indeed, the most singularly remarkable achievement of his career to date is probably playing a full 82 games in the 2000-2001 season after he was jumped from behind in a bar, hit over the head with a bottle and stabbed eleven times just before training camp. Of course, were he Michael Jordan, his recovering from lung surgery, playing an entire season, averaging 25.3 points per game and, you know, not dying after such an attack would be the stuff of legend and myth and 72 columns by Rick Reilly. Since it’s Paul Pierce, his wounds were described as “superficial” and all record of the incident is now kept in that “Let us never speak of this again” file David Sterns keeps in the bottom drawer of his desk.

(In that file you’ll also find pretty much everything to do with Kobe Bryant that doesn’t involve him being super fantastic. That halftime vignette on his idyllic home life the other night was breath-taking. Is Andy Samberg now writing for ABC? Are they trying to be ironic? I look forward to future stories about Ron Artest’s role in negotiating Middle East peace, Isaiah Thomas teaching inner city kids valuable money management skills and Donald Sterling’s enduring commitment to winning with class.)

Of course, Pierce is not nearly the player Jordan was. Nor has he ever, even once, been the dominant player of the post-Jordan era. That list is a fairly short one, probably including Kobe, Iverson, Shaq, Wade, LeBron and Duncan. But nor would you have included Pierce among the next tier of unique, if not quite legendary, stars—Nowitzki, Nash, Garnett, Kidd and maybe Yao Ming—either.

He isn’t as spectacularly skilled as Carter, but obviously possessed twice the work ethic (in fairness, most 12-year-old boys could claim as much). Is he better than Tracy McGrady? Probably not on pure talent, but maybe on overall result. But what about, say, Tony Parker, Manu Ginobli, Carmelo Anthony, Chauncey Billups, Dwight Howard, Chris Paul, Richard Hamilton, Gilbert Arenas, Carlos Boozer, Deron Williams, Amare Stoudemire or Antawn Jamison? Would Pierce have ranked ahead of some of those guys? Most? Surely not all. At least in terms of measurable stardom.

Even on this Celtics team, Pierce tends to get lost. Ray Allen is a better shooter. Kevin Garnett is a better rebounder (and more impressive presence). Rajon Rondo is a flashier passer. James Posey might be a superior defender. Leon Powe is more endearing. And Sam Cassell is weirder-looking. Glen Davis even has a larger ass.

(This also makes Pierce and the rest of the Celtics roster perfectly suited. Since he’s very good at half a dozen things, but not the best at anything, every other player with some specific skill easily complements him. To speak in terms Bob Villa can understand, he is the wood frame of the house. Or possibly the cement foundation. To be honest, I don’t know much about architecture.)

Pierce’s actual numbers then are kind of surprising. He’s ninth among active players in total points (behind Shaq, Iverson, Kobe, Garnett, Allen, Duncan, Webber and Nowitzki). And on a per game basis, he’s sixth (behind Iverson, LeBron, Shaq, Kobe and Vince). He’s also eighth in steals, 10th in three-point field goals and 12th in Player Efficiency Rating (a measure no one understands, but everyone mentions when it helps in making their point).

According to Basketball Reference’s vaguely reliable Hall of Fame Probability, Pierce is the 11th most likely current player to eventually join the Hall. All-time that rating puts him 65th overall, just ahead of Tiny Archibald, Jo Jo White and Kevin McHale. (Granted, Basketball Reference puts Vince Carter 51st. So being a sociopath apparently isn’t taken into account.)

Pierce has essentially spent the last decade playing great basketball. Just not of the kind that would make him more freakishly impressive than Amare Stoudemire or as relentlessly polarizing as Manu Ginobli. It would help of course if he starred in a stop snitching video (see Anthony, Carmelo) or blogged (see Arenas, Gilbert). But he hasn’t. He’s just played consistently at a very high, but not dominant, level. Which is obviously a problem.

The closest comparison to what Paul Pierce has accomplished in these Finals is probably what James Worthy, MVP in 1988, did with the Lakers. Their Finals numbers are even similar (22/7/4 for Worthy, 21/5/6 for Pierce). But Worthy was never the best all-around player on his team. Pierce always was, the vast majority of us just never realized it.

So maybe the enduring lesson of Paul Pierce, owner of the most under-rated sports nickname of the last decade, is this: the truth is never quite as exciting as perception.

The NBA, like most forms of public life, rewards the exceptional. But Pierce, at least when compared to the best of his profession, does nothing obviously exceptional. Despite two certifiably great games (28 points and eight assists in Game 2, 38 points, eight assists and six rebounds in Game 5), two other nights of 20 or more points, a double-double in Game 6 and admirably guarding Bryant for long stretches, I’m not sure he made a single memorable play in these Finals. He goes to the basket relentlessly (he shot 19 free throws in Game 5), but Pierce doesn’t so much drive to the basket as wander there, stumbling from one obstacle to the next before lunging at the hoop. He also always seem on the verge of falling down (something that helps him draw so many fouls).

Even his signature moment in this series—collapsing in Game 1 as if shot in the knee, requiring a wheelchair ride to the dressing room and then coming back a few minutes later with no visible sign of pain—was strangely anti-climactic. Less than impressed, the crowd in L.A., in a rare moment of attention, chanted “wheel-chair! wheel-chair!” at him once the series moved to the West Coast. Indeed, he seemed somehow to have deflated his own moment. If only he’d limped a little more noticeably afterwards. Or grimaced more frequently. He didn’t sell it.

That’s apparently where we’re at. Reality demands a certain level of theatre. You have to act the part. And what’s probably the fault of MTV. Or Karl Rove.

But that also probably makes Paul Pierce the sort of unheralded, quietly great, professional athlete we’re always wishing we could root for. Only we don’t. Because we’re too busy wondering how good a father Kobe Bryant is. Or why KG won’t do everyone a favour and disembowel Sasha Vujacic.

Such is the NBA. Such is life. The truth, as always, hurts.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Paul Pierce As Michael Corleone In The Godfather

Paul Pierce: Today Kobe Stans are dead to me. So is Phil Jackson. Antoine Walker. Rick Pitino. Kobe. Today I settled all family business so don’t tell me that you’re innocent. Admit what you did. Admit it you Kobe Cultists. You sided with the enemy. You said nobody is beating Kobe this season. Not me.…not anybody. It’s not so much what you said, but how you said it. Like you were in bed with him. Spooning him. Whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Whispering sweet nothings in Kobe Bryant’s ear about being on the level of Jordan.” Michael Jordan! You should be ashamed of yourself.

[Kobe Stan sobbing]

Paul Pierce: Get him a drink. Don't be afraid, Stanley. Come on, you think I'd make Kobe into the scapegoat? I'm Godfather to your Kobe.

[Kobe Stan gets handed a drink]

Paul Pierce
: Go ahead. Drink. Drink. No, you're out of the NBA prediction and prognosticating business, that's your punishment. You're finished. I'm putting you on a plane to Vegas. Doc?

[Doc Rivers hands Stanley the tickets]

Paul Pierce
: I want you to stay there, you understand?

[Kobe Stans nod]

Paul Pierce: Only don't tell me that you're innocent. Because it insults my intelligence and it makes me very angry.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

NBA Finals Game 6 In Pictures

No words this time, you know what I've been saying about Paul Pierce and Kobe Bryant for years, so tonight just pictures.
Okay maybe a few comments:

Contrary to every talking head or half-way self pronounced that says otherwise Paul Pierce is as great as Kobe Bryant. There's nothing Kobe can do that Pierce can't do. You may like Kobe's style more but that's a style preference not based on substance. Sorry.

Robert Horry can retire because James Posey is the new you.

Paul Pierce has been the greatest player on the bad Celtics teams, the so-so Celtics teams and a great Celtics team. The man is almost unstoppable.

Kobe Bryant is NOT Michael Jordan.

Kobe Stans will never run out of excuses and ready made explanations everytime he comes up short. This time it was referees, Andrew Bynum and bad teammates. Funny how no one complained about his teammates when they got him to the #1 seed in the West and later got him to the NBA Finals in that vaunted, all-time most competitive Western Conference. Even though they were just outplayed, outclassed and outgunned collectively and individually (yes Paul Pierce outplayed Kobe Bryant) you just know there'll never be enough mulligans in the world that the stans won't use to write-off his failures.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

I Can't Believe I'm Even Typing This But...

Apparently, god has a sense of humor as he's seen fit to romantically link Sam Cassell to are you ready for this?























You Sure?





































Because once you see this you can't unsee it




























Ananda Lewis.


By the way, Kevin Garnett is dead to me. He's a loser and he's always going to be a loser. He shrinks in big moments and when you boil it down he's a slightly more consistent version of Lamar Odom. Only difference between Kevin & Lamar is one looks like a turtle and one looks like a goat and even then I'm pretty sure The Ninja Turtles whooped an evil goat's ass one time on the TV show so you know how it would go down if those two fought. On a night that Paul Pierce scored 38 Points grabbed 8 Rebounds dished 7 Assists and shot 45% and I'm not sure but I think he worked the concession stand during halftime and didn't lose a step and all you can contribute is 13 points and 5 fouls. You get a ring and Cracker Jack ought to start putting them into boxes as a toy because that's how much they're worth. Do me a favor and don't show up Tuesday, please. Thanks.

Celtics in 6, still.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Celtics Win Game 4

Paul Pierce, after all, has been the best go-to guy in this series. Which is to say better than Bryant, no matter how many of us forecasted these Finals as some sort of victory lap for the MVP.

Pierce out-closed the game's foremost closer again by asking to switch onto Kobe defensively for the second half, helping to prevent the explosion we all expected after Bryant failed to register a first-half field goal.
Best believe I'mma have a big dinner Sunday before the game so you can smell my shit after Paul Pierce gets that ring and a MVP trophy when it's over.



"Paul came to me at halftime and said, 'I want to guard Kobe. Let me guard him,"' Rivers said. "I think people will look at his offense, but I thought we won the game because Paul was a tremendous defensive player tonight."

Pierce, who had not committed a foul in the first half, said he thought he could use that to his advantage against Bryant.

"I felt like I could be a little bit more physical on him," Pierce said. "The whole thing is, it's hard to stop a player like Kobe Bryant. He's the MVP, numerous scoring titles. If I can go out there and make him work for everything he got, you give yourselves a chance, and that's all I wanted to do."

Allen had guarded Bryant in the first half and held him to 0-for-4 shooting. But Pierce, a little taller and a little stronger, was able to keep the MVP from taking over the game.

"I would have suggested it a long time ago," Allen said. "But it took for Paul to say, 'Let me guard him.' When he said that, I knew he wanted him, and he was ready for the challenge, and I was like, 'Let's do it. Take him."'

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Paul Pierce's Better Is Better Than The Lakers' Better Tonite

It's just one game. I know. But this one game was a big one, in the minds of everyone who played in it and everyone that saw it.

We all know who every fan and analyst and prognosticator and expert in the world is pulling for or predicting is going to win.

We all know Kobe is supposed to be Jordan and supposed to be able to singlehandedly will his team to a Lakers championship in 4 or 5.

But if Barack Obama can win the Democratic Nomination in a calendar year against the machine that was Hillary Rodham Clinton in the face of adversity and skepticism and deliver a miracle to the people who believed in him when experts thought it foolish to, than Paul Pierce and the Celtics can win this series to.

1 game down. 3 to go. Another small step towards the team goal, another step towards Paul Pierce proving he is the criminally underrated elite superstar who I've publicly proclaimed he was for so many years to people who didn't want to hear it and most importantly another step towards showing that even a God-King can bleed, word to Leonidas from 300.


Amazing.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Oh yeah, This Is Happening This Week

My Favorite Basketball Player vs. My Least Favorite.

This will be good.

That said, my prediction:

Celtics in 6.

Paul Pierce is going to be the NBA Finals MVP.

Lakers Fans and Kobe Stans familiarize yourself with this picture
Paul Pierce, grinning in a celebratory fashion after almost singlehandedly shutting down another series in a pivotal game and thus becoming, once again, the assassin in the middle of the night, efficiently displacing the last flicker of light from the body's of the opposition.

I say remember this photo, because you'll see it again.