The 50 Worst Lil Wayne Lines [Examining The So-Called Best Rapper Alive]

[Editor's Note: This is a weak man on the microphone, ladies and gents and it takes a strong man who loves hip-hop and loves His Aura Was Orange to put as much time and dedication and endure things no man ought endure, like listen to Dwayne Carter's songs and lyrics to show you how much this guy truly sucks. All I ask in return is that you hear me out or at least consider the facts that I've painstakingly amassed and tell me at the conclusion whether I'm justified in what i say or I'm clinically insane. That is all.]

Wayne is the biggest bullshit artist, product of an extremely weak era ass rapper it's ridiculous. He forces so much garbage that either makes little sense, no sense at all or just has no thought or cleverness to it's basic second grade simplicity. He cheapens metaphors in a way that I've only seen Fabolous do. I cringe every time I see his Spike from Gremlins face or hear his prepubescent voice getting ready to murder (in the bad way) a song. He's as deep as a YMCA kiddie pool.

On top of all that this dude is way too cocky and his fans are way too vocal about him to hide under the "his words being overanalyzed" defense. Wayne walks around thinking, being purported and all but declaring he's the best and if that's the argument him and people in his flock care to make then him getting his ass torn to shreds by people here and elsewhere who've heard and lived in eras where his dribble wouldn't have passed the smell test is justifiable. If he didn't have this self-important attitude and cockiness than he wouldn't leave himself open to this kind of criticism but when he calls himself 'the best rapper alive' then he deserves the scrutiny and he's not just rapping for fun and in a light hearted manner and we should all who consider ourselves true fans of the genre take off the kiddie gloves when dealing with him. That's the difference between him and Nore and a lot of these other rappers who we've dedicated threads with naming their most ridiculous quotes. Those rappers don't take themselves all that serious for the most part. Especially Nore. Noreaga is a fun-loving dude who isn't making the sales pitch that he's the savior of hip-hop and so I think it's off base to look at him with that degree of criticism over his works. He clearly isn't trying. He's just going through the motion to appeal to the largest common denominator as far as musical audiences.

For comparative purposes, I hate 2Pac but he had tons more depth to his best works than Wayne. He had a self-anointing style too but at his best you could tell he was super-intelligent, thoughtful, articulate and he didn't force NEARLY as much as Wayne and so you can excuse some of his vanity. That's not to say he didn't have just as an annoying a flock as Wayne does but you could take them a little more serious because 2Pac had more credibility as a pure artist than Wayne. It's evident 2Pac had more talent than Wayne has and that 2Pac deserves more reverence than this low talent hack from Louisiana.

Again don't get me wrong, if you take away the buzz and the arrogant swagger of Wayne and you put him in the same character as someone more affable and less self-involved it'd be a different story. But when you put him up as a great of his time (which for all purposes is a very talent depleted era in Hip-Hop), fair or unfair, you then have to have him survive the test of comparing him to other greats of other eras and there's no way you can put his ass up there with other greats of other stronger eras of Hip-Hop. It's just not a credible case. The fact that this is even arguable shows that Jesus died in vain.

To be great the percentage of great lines to bad ones ought to be pretty high to pretty low and Wayne's as a whole is probably under .500. The content of your music must be substantive to be considered great and nothing sticks when you've heard a Wayne mixtape or album if you're judging it with any objectivity. He's not what Hio-Hop needs, he's just what Hip-Hop is stuck with until Hip-Hop navigates itself out of the wilderness it finds itself in.

Contrary to popular opinion, Lil Wayne is absolutely unequivocally abysmal and I aim to prove within 50 of his wackest lines the very point.

If you aren't convinced after reading some of these than perhaps I'll update the list down the line with 50 more and so on and so forth until you are convinced that this guy is as much a contender for the crown as the Cincinnati Bengals will be this fall....

The 50 Worst, Most Forced, Most Non-Sensical, Idiotic Things Wayne Has Said In His Career:

"Now where ya hoe at
Wipe ya feet on the doormat
I'ma bring the N.O. Back Like a nigga with no back"

"get girls wet like backs"

"I'm hot like dogs"

"My girl is prego [pregnant] but I don't want it, so I'll cut it out like Joey Gladstone"


"I got a bitch with me I call her miss without draws I go to the bank they call me mr withdraws"


"like the number after 1 I'mma get me 2"


"Baby I'm an acrobat. Sweetie, I'm a stuntdevil.
You can't get on my level 'cause I am so unleveled"


"Check my bio, I started high with 2 Oz, Just like Ohio"


"your like a bitch with no ass you aint got shit"


"I'm just trying to let my hair back,
and chill where cant see air at, ya hear that. champagne clear liquor put that beer back, i got work so cheap its on sears racks."


"I'm in the hood - I'm butta on bread like parkay and I'm all about me like Do Re"


"what are you asking, if i don't have the answer
it's probably on the web, like I'm a damn tarantula"


"speeding like a cop behind me, tryna catch-up with this girl like some 57 heinz"


"I tell my girl when you fuck me better fuck me good cos if another girl could she go fuck me good"


"I'm from the jungle when a lion eat a cobra
and I get money, got no "moneyphobia"


"even when I'm laying on my back I'm never backing down"


"i got old money, could'a bought a dinosaur"


"And I'm gonna be with my dogs like Goof Troop...Money over female dogs bitch roof roof"


"coke transactions over the phone, we call them blowjobs"


"being fake is pussy so nigga I'm a virgin"


"I'm a pill popping' animal, syrup sipping nigga I'm so high you couldn't reach me with a fuckin antenna"


"I'm a minute passed pissed and its about to get shitty."


"I always thought I was fly like I had a pigeon on my back."


"Sicker than the 3rd floor of the hospital."


"My flow is sicker than a patient that is HIV Positive."


"I'm wearing white mink like I'm polar bear"


"Her head is crazy so she's insane."


"You can't see me...Ray Charles."


"her toes smelling mint like tic tacs"


"I'm fly like Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Bee-tle-juice."


"Better rapper than what covers your candy"


"told a bitch whore hey like the catcher for the Yankees"


"I'm not only hot like stove, but I also cook like it's cousin, oven"


"Shoot a nigga in his thigh and leg and tell him catch up like Mayonnaise"


"a bitch is a female dog and a dog is a man's best friend"


"and i know this world is cold and deceiving but i keep my head up like my nose is bleeding"


"bitch I'm the bomb like tick tick"


"Put me on 4th and long because u know how Wayne kick it"


"One finger up and I'm out, cuz you ain't even worth two"


"I don't know how you love her I wish I never knew her she only gave me brain she was just another tutor"


"I call them April babies cuz they fools"


"I get my cheese like Mickey Mouse so you better donald duck!"


"Boy I'm sitting on green like piss in the grass"


".....after I'm done with this track its gonna need a couple bandages"


"I don't know karate but after the brain I kick you out"


"It's like the beat was screaming murder me...And I'm a murderer...So I murdered it"


"And Me I'm Still Spitting Like A Retard
And These Niggas Soft They Should Be Rapping In Leotards"


"hold on this beat is retarded, so I'ma go short yellow bus flow, and take ya heart like February 1- 4"


"I'm hot too, baby girl I'm soup"


"My flows crazy! I ain't too sane...but I am the shit and they just poop stains.."


"I know the game is crazy its more crazy then its ever been, I'm married to that crazy bitch, call me Kevin Federline"


"I'm so motherfucking high, I could eat a star"

I rest my case now. You be the judge